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I also sought dépassé the power dynamics I’d witness - like, after so many years watching older guys and younger girls, when I was 17, 18, 19, I started actively trying to Lumière older guys. I cadeau’t know whether that’s a coincidence. I will never know which came first – whether I had some innate tastes, pépite whether the porn created them.”Other women find themselves using porn not get aroused, ravissant to escape from Attaque pépite trauma. Author Jessica Valentish wrote a memoir embout her experiences of addiction, and described how she used porn as a coping mechanism, external while writing the book and dredging up painful experiences.
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It didn’t have anything to do with homosexuality pépite bisexuality – and I was always bisexual. Not seeing my story reflected there made me feel bad. So that was always the story that I held in my head as the ‘right’ way to have sexual desire.
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It’s a question many women that I speak to ask themselves, and Nous that I’ve often wondered embout. When I was younger, I had this idea that when it came to sex, I should Quand completely passive – that sex was something that should Lorsque offrande to me. Was that passivity always there, pépite did I learn it from porn?
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As Dr Birchard explains: “To anyone who uses it in that way, compulsively, it’s not really about sex. It’s about anaesthetising a difficult to manage state. It can Sinon anxiety, Violence, depression. It could Sinon loneliness. Whether it’s a man pépite a woman, if the function of the sexual behaviour is compulsive, then it’s embout escape.”
She now rarely watches porn. “I ut feel I was protected somewhat from the more negative psychological fin, parce que I just didn’t like to watch the hardcore hetero stuff.
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“It impacted me in a contingent of ways,” Erica tells me. “It made me attracted to véridique sorts of sexual scenarios that I might not have otherwise considered. Like being treated roughly in bed, being talked to in a demeaning way.